Tuesday, 21 January 2014
My Christmas was good, thank you for asking. I hope yours was too. I had a good morning with the family and then celebrated my friend's 30th at a big party that night. New Years was a lot less good due to a sad friend and being forced to spend it with someone I'd rather never see again, but I survived so that's a good start to my year. Since then I have been working and not working, swimming a bit and having a church BBQ. It has been a good start to my year.
I've also had a painful date (I really need to stop dating, I just don't enjoy it at all), got my lip pierced and had a cat poop on my clothes at the house I'm currently house sitting in. The last two days have been spent in almost total silence as I attempt to avoid doing anything that might delay my piercing's healing. I've watched way too much tv (Doctor Who, yay) and given myself a sore back from sitting down too much and become bored, but so far no death-related thoughts and only a few depressed ones.
What follows are my fun attempts to get an outfit photo without my tripod because I left it at home. And all without smiling because I took them just after getting my lip pierced. Oh, and with clothes on the floor because I'm messy :)
Monday, 23 December 2013
(Warning: many photos of my face. As usual, wearing no makeup and not edited except for the last few that were taken using special effects on mah camera.)
Today my hair looked cool. It always looks terrible after washing (which I did last night) because of not using shampoo or conditioner. My hair never achieves shiny and silky like hair is “supposed” to be like. That is fine by me! However, it means that my hair never just looks good without handling the day after I’ve washed it. So, I brushed it into my usual style of most-of-it-on-one-side and was left with a puff of ear-length hair sticking out on the other side. In irritation, I brushed this all over until I was left with most of my hair combed over to the left side of my head. Since my hair is currently an awkward length, the left side looked great, while the right looked like a mullet. So I pinned it up to look like an undercut.
And friends, you are receiving all of this boring hairstyling information because it worked! Both my mother and my co-worker (who is actually a hairdresser) thought I’d cut my hair. Hooray. I attempted to get photographic evidence of this, but I think I failed.
Friday, 13 December 2013
Friends, I am extremely blessed. Yesterday was the last day of school and my last day of working at my local high school as both a teacher aide and a youth worker, after a year and a quarter of the former and four years of the latter. I struggled many times over the years, trying to do my best in roles that I don’t see myself as particularly suited to, but yesterday everyone had nothing but nice words for me as they farewelled me and wished me the best for the future. I often think that I am not very likeable and it’s so surprising and gratifying to me to have so many teachers (and a few kids!) say they were going to miss me. I am going to miss them all too.
I think my unfortunate sunburn on my arms rather spoils the look of these photos, but due to my no Photoshop policy, they remain unchanged. After all, the reality is that I failed at putting on sunscreen properly and paid for it. I like the outfit regardless and had some fun playing around with my new camera’s timing settings (two seconds is not much time to pose!) and listening to The Humans are Dead by Flight of the Conchords, which is the reason for my beautiful singing photo.
Friday, 6 December 2013
I have a new camera, everybody! I was getting sick of trying to use the point and shoot I dropped in a river when borrowing it from my brother, because every time I turned it on I had to fiddle around with the settings to be able to shoot anything, and I couldn’t connect it to the computer. Since I’m going travelling next year, I figured I might as well get myself a camera that would give me good quality photos while I whizzed and walked through foreign countrysides as well as taking good blog photos. I have to admit, I also wanted the potential for bokeh.
So I bought myself a Sony Alpha NEX-3N mirrorless camera. Like a DSLR in many ways, with a much larger sensor than a point and shoot and with interchangeable lenses, but much smaller than a DSLR unless using a bulky lens. So far I am excited about it, but I have much to learn. I’m hoping that having plonked down so much money for it and having a camera with many exciting features will help me to stay excited about learning to use it and take photos. I admit that sometimes I feel it’s all a bit futile, getting into photography, when everyone and zir dog seems to do it (and I always want to stand out from the crowd, lol) but I have to fight that feeling, because it’s silly.
Oh, and the green thing I’m holding? It’s a smoothie made with banana, mango and spinach. Kind of my take on the ubiquitous Starbucks coffee cup, since I haven’t been to Starbucks in five years.
As I said, I wanted to be able to get bokeh, that fabulous effect where the foreground is sharp and the background blurry that so many bloggers use. It’s fairly complex to understand how it occurs, but usually it is achieved with a shallow depth of field from a high aperture. My camera, with its 16-50mm lens, does a good job of achieving bokeh in macro shots but unfortunately is not what I’m after in my self-portrait shots. I think I need a 16mm or smaller lens for that.
As you can see in the photos above, my whole shot is pretty much in focus, which is not what I want. Because I use a self-timer, I have to set the focus before I’m in the shot and my camera isn’t having a bit of it. I tried focusing on an object that I then hurled out of the way when I arrived, but it didn’t work. The only one that did work was the one below, where the object being hurled was my little brother. Since he’s not around for most of my shoots, it’s back to the drawing board
Friday, 29 November 2013
- I am thankful for God and zir grace in the face of human life. Although I often wrestle with God's identity and character and the way the church seeks to represent God here on earth, when it comes down to it, I cannot escape from God's love and that is awesome.
- My family are so fabulous. I still live at home with my mother, father, 20 year old brother and 13 year old brother and my relationship with all of them is so good that sometimes it makes me want to cry. We all care for each other and look out for each other and spend time together and I know that my life is irrevocably changed for the better because of them.
- The friends who have flowed into and around my life. I don't have the soulmate/best friends forever lady I'm after, or a manfriend who wants to marry me, and I'd like both of those people (applications are currently being accepted!) but there are many people in my life who have added much to it.
- My Bosom Bloggers. It's such a hilarious name for our group, but even though I barely ever post about bras they still like me and send me presents for Secret Santa and are an online family for me.
The awesome knickers I received for Secret Santa.
- The opportunities I have in life are pretty staggering. I have good jobs, good education, a stable economy and somewhere to live. I am not in danger of injury, death or starvation. Being thankful for this helps to remind me that I want to help others have the same opportunities, even if they don't want to take them (we're all different).
- Finally figuring out my style. This one is so trivial compared to the rest, but I feel more in control of myself and less at the mercy of the male gaze now that I know that what makes me feel good and strong isn't what girly, feminine clothes I'm being told I should wear but the mishmash of girly with manly, and some punk rolled in with it. Girly and feminine are great things and I don't equate them with lack of power on others, but to me they take away my empowerment just because they aren't me. And I'm glad that I've worked that out.
One of my favourite outfits of all time.
- Last but not least, you who read my blog. Sometimes I struggle to keep blogging, because I feel like nobody at all is reading this thing and I'm just waffling to myself, but I keep going anyway because someone will comment in a timely fashion or mention one of my posts. My blog will never be big because of my lack of interest in Twitter (yes, that's the only thing standing between me and global domination) but I am happy enough that there are some people who sometimes cast their eyes over these words and pictures. Thank you.
Tuesday, 5 November 2013
Friday, 1 November 2013
One of my takes on the idea of redefining sexy is that I'd like it to be optional, please. I think Western culture places a very strong emphasis on a woman's "need" to be sexy to have value. We are supposed to have jobs, have husbands, have children, have immaculate homes and be professional, ambitious, charming achievers - who are also sexy. Everything we do has to be sexy.
|Reading must be sexy. (Image source)|
|Being fit must be sexy. (Image source)|
|Being a mum must be sexy. (Cheating slightly here, as this is also a "fitspo" picture.) (Image source)|
|Working must be sexy. (Image source)|
I would like sexy to be an optional extra in being a woman (or man). Sure, when I get married I will definitely want to feel sexy, both for my husband's pleasure and my own. But right now I'm unmarried, single, Christian and would like to be valued in my own eyes and those of others for different qualities. I wouldn't mind if people find me pretty, attractive, cute, even beautiful. But I don't want sex to be the first thing to spring to a person's mind when zie looks at me (bearing in mind that some people will think sexual thoughts about me no matter what I'm looking like, and sometimes even only from knowing I'm a woman without any idea of my appearance at all).
The group I blog in is extremely varied and we run the gamut from extremely conservative (well, as conservative as you can be when talking about bras) to completely open about bodies and sex and the expression thereof.
- If any of those women want to dress "sexy" all the time, I want her to be able to do so and be seen as a valuable, interesting and competent person and I will fight for her right to do so without being harassed for it.
- But if any of those women wants to never dress "sexy", I want her to be able to do so and be seen as a valuable, interesting, competent person and I will fight for her right to do so without being harassed for it.
I want it to be our choice. Not our defining feature.
Links to the other blog posts on this topic:
Two Cakes on a Plate: An introduction and some general thoughts on the theme
Two Cakes on a Plate: Full bust problems - Bringing sexy back?
Braless in Brasil: Porn Star Boobies and Breast Feeding
Le Gros Bonnets: Redefining sexy: new series coming up
Sevenlies: Redefining Sexy: Underneath Your Clothes
Undiegamer: What “Sexy” Means To Me
Voluptuous and Beautiful: Defining What I Find Sexy; And Why It Matters
Two Cakes on a Plate: What's up with the high-waisted knickers?
Hourglassy: Redefining Sexiness: What's Your Preference?
Wide Curves: The Sexy (R)evolution
Braless in Brasil: Sexy Is...
Hourglassy: Being Sexy and Black