Monday, 16 April 2012

Being Brave (OOTD)

In 2009 I shaved my head after recognizing that my shoulder length brown and blonde hair was not something I wanted for my own enjoyment, but rather to fit in with the expectations of people (especially guys) around me. After realising that the girls I was envying were 15 (and I 18) I knew that I didn't want to be in that space any more. I didn't have to shave my head, of course, I could've had a less extreme haircut, but I'd wanted to shave my head for some time and since I was rebelling against conforming anyway, I figured I might as well go to extremes.

My parents weren't happy, but they got over it.

Although I'll happily admit that having a shaved head is not the most flattering look for me, I also want to be one of those people who points out that there's no need to go through life looking your best.

Anyway, I've changed my hair a lot since the beginning of the year and I'm not really sure why. I've liked the changes that I've made and think that I've stumbled on some hairstyles this year that I really like, but I've wanted to keep changing anyway. I put it off for a while because I always get negative feedback when I bring it up. People ask why I have to change my hair again and I look so pretty right now and what am I avoiding by changing my hair.

The last question/objection is, of course, the only valid one because it's no one else's business how pretty or otherwise I look, and it's a good question/objection. I think the answer is that I'm not avoiding anything by changing my hair (but I could be wrong) but when I don't change my hair when I want to, I'm letting myself be swayed by concerns that don't mean much to me and aesthetic considerations ("you look hot with long hair") that belong to people I don't care about. Basically, if I want to shave my head and I don't it's because I'm scared of what people will say.

I don't like to be scared of what people say, because, as the saying goes, "the people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind".

Long story short:

Ta da! Didn't see that coming, did you?
I was nervous about going to work today after my mum said I'll get people calling me a boy again and then I'll get upset (totally valid, as it's happened before) but my workmates didn't say much. I decided to dress so that you could definitely tell I was a girl. I think it worked.

It takes a lot of courage to shave your head as a girl, I think. It'd change depending on what particular culture was around you, but as I walk down the street I'm super aware of people's eyes on me. I have to be ready all the time to answer why I did it and do sometimes get mistaken for a boy or, more often, a lesbian. It turns a simple thing like a haircut into everyone else's business. I can handle it!



Can you tell I'm a girl yet?

Wanna know something awesome? My brother and I match. We've had matching haircuts and matching outfits before, and now we're doing it again. He shaved my head and I shaved his!


9 comments:

  1. I really like it. I know, that's exactly what people always say about your hair - but you really rock it!
    so. just wanted to tell you that. ;)

    I like the outfit as well, although I would've combined the skirt (love it) with a shirt that has smaller/narrower stripes.

    I like the brother sister pic xD

    It's really crazy that a haircut (a haaaircut!) "says" so much about someone. Or people think it says so much about you. I mean, it's just a haircut!

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    1. Haha well, this haircut often gets people telling me they don't like it! It seems that shaving your head exempts you from the normal polite responses. And thank you very much :)

      Hmm, I do have one shirt that has narrower stripes. It's long-sleeved and black and grey instead of white (well, really light grey) and black. I will try that sometime!

      It is crazy, but in a way it's kinda cool. It'd be nice if it could "say something" about a person without there being any negative connotations with it if the person doesn't want it to say anything.

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  2. Hey, I actually think you rock a shaved head very well. You're one of maybe 5 women who could pull this look off.

    I think it's ridiculous how much emphasis is placed on a woman's appearance and how she "should" look - screw that! We're all unique, and we deserve to look however the hell we want to.

    You look confident and radiant :) Rock it!!

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    1. Thank you :) It's funny how we're complaining about appearance while we both own style blogs - I guess it shows that we do want to look the way we choose to look rather than whatever society dictates. I think fashion/style blogging really helps people to be more comfortable with making their own choices.

      It's amazing how well "fake it till you make it" works as far as confidence goes, too!

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  3. "...having a shaved head is not the most flattering look for me..."

    I politely disagree; I think it's just our culture talkin'.

    You look darling, and I think you'll love being shorn. It makes getting ready in the morning so, so easy.

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    1. Thank you :) I was at a wedding yesterday and was perfectly happy with my shorn head - until the wind set in! It's lovely not having to worry about messing up my hair though.

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    2. No more worrying about wind. You can wear any hat without squashing your hair. You can sleep in later. You may feel tougher and more fearless--- I did.

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  4. What are you talking about, you look good with a shaved head. I really like it on you. I hate how people think they are entitled to tell you that your haircut/outfit/look/whatever is wrong - especially when it's something outside the 'norm'. What are they trying to achieve? Make you change it? I usually think the people who do that are the ones most uncomfortable with themselves and are probably actually envious... Because someone who loves themself/is comfortable with themself doesn't feel the need to bring other people down.

    Bonus - lots of cute hats/scarves for winter without the worry of hat hair! My stepdad has his head shaved and always has to have his hat or he gets cold.

    I wish I was brave enough to do something like that - I don't know if I would shave my head but something that would help me to get over caring so much what other people (ones I don't care about anyway) think.

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    1. Thanks :) I also believe that's probably the reason that people object to others' appearance, unless they actually believe it's unhealthy/dangerous for the person. I could totally deal with people objecting to something I was wearing if it was because they thought I might be in danger because of it. I might not heed their advice, but at least it would be nice to know they cared.

      Yeah I am looking out for cute beanies because I am going to be wearing one all winter lol

      Do it! Do anything! What Rebekah Jaunty said is so true. I feel more beautiful and tougher and more confident than I did when I had hair - even if it was a hairstyle I really liked. I am even happier with my shaved head this time than I was first time around. It's not about having a shaved head, as such, so I'm not telling you to do that, but when it comes down to it being "weird" and happy feels so much better than being "normal" and feeling vaguely stifled. I've had both and being weird is kinda tough when it comes to comments, but like you said, people only really criticise because of their own insecurity anyway.

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