Tuesday, 13 August 2013

Locked Doors (OOTD)

Sometimes I get annoyed that I usually have to feel like my clothes express who I am, because when I wear something that isn't right, I feel uncomfortable. I feel like I'm not properly getting across who I really am. Don't ask me why it's so important that I do express that, but I want to be able to look back on my outfit photos or in the mirror and go "oh yeah, that's me". Sometimes I get that but more often I don't and it niggles at me, because I usually feel like I'm so close but just not quite there, like the right look is just on the other side of a locked door.

Today's outfit was good. Because of the cold I had to stay more wrapped up than I prefer, but with my jacket open and scarf removed, I looked at myself and went "yeah, I like this". At the same time, I almost felt like I was wearing a costume. I spend so much time looking at other bloggers (Delightfully Tacky especially) and loving how awesome they look, seeing the accessories and poses and makeup and clothes that appeal to me that I copy them, thus ending up feeling like I'm dressing up as one of them instead of being myself. And yet at the same time, I feel more confident, more attractive, more worth knowing, more capable and more me. I guess seeing and copying bloggers I like gives me the key to unlock that door and reach that final look.

And I dislike it because I hate looking like I'm not thinking for myself. *shrug* I'll go with whatever makes me feel better, I think, and if someone does want to condemn me for being a sheep, I'll invite zir to stick around and find out. That's about all I can do.

Now that I have rambled about that, I apologise for the atrocious quality of the following photos. I waited too long to head outside so it was too dark. I'm very disappointed about it. Many are blurry because I had to stay completely still for ages for each photo, which I apparently failed. Nevermind.

The way my outfit looked most of the day, while I was at school.




In these next photos I am wearing my new lipstick, bought yesterday for $19 and the first time I have ever bought lipstick. Although I love the look of lipstick, I've never understood how people could wear it without looking silly when it wore off unevenly, or got caught on chapped lips. I took the plunge, however, reasoning that if I dropped $19 on it then I had to wear it.

Day one: managed to wear it. Wore it to school today, in fact, and had several people comment on it and on how bright I looked today. Some were neutral, most complimentary. I felt insecure, especially since my lips are chapped and made the lipstick look funny, but no problems.



These last two are especially blurry, but I thought they looked kinda cool. I can't even see in these photos because I had to take my glasses off to wear the sunnies xD



2 comments:

  1. Gorgeous, I especially love that lipstick with your blue hair.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Amy! I always get a bit nervous when I put it on, but when I catch a glimpse of my colourful face and hair I grin xD

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